Sunday, March 30, 2008

Waterless Urinals!!

So Friday night my friends and I are out at Squatters (a lovely SLC microbrewery that also carries such local beer brands as: Polygamy Porter, Provo Girl Pilsner, and Captain Bastards). For the AA and LDS members out there, they also have a lovely microbrewed root beer and yummy sweet potato fries (ask for them, I forgot and spent the evening looking on with envy at my friend's plate).

Anyway. I digress. I go to the little boy's room (you have to go all the way to the back and down the stairs. It's not readily apparent.) and I dont know if these urinals are new or if I just have always used the handicap restroom or something, but I am confronted by this line of very sheik, sleek urinals. Wow. I am impressed. And then I notice an adorable little bee in the urinal. It took me a second to realize this was probably there so guys would have something to aim at and quit shooting for the floor. I was charmed.

Then, to my even greater surprise and delight, I realized I was before a waterless urinal! That's right kids. Once I finished my business and stepped back, a nosy motion sensor detected/assumed my departure and, rather than flush, everything was just sucked?/vacuumed? away underneath like this stopper looking thing where the drain would ordinarily be. It was perhaps my most satisfactory urinal experience ever. Everything was very nice and clean,hygienic and apparently eco-friendly! My roommate and I later mused on the energy output such a device would require but I think you could probably use some sort of like gravitational/kinetic/physics-esque contrivance to do the job.

Oh yeah, so after Squatters we ended up going to this awful club. Lame dress code. Lame smoke machines. Understaffed. And the crowd . . . well it seems to me that this is where a lot of lame people over 30 (or 40) go to try and give themselves the illusion that they're still hip. The music . . . some good top 40 interspersed with awful selections from 80s hair bands and 90s R&B. At least I can confidently say I wasnt the only one in the room with arthritic knees.

Lesson learned: never go back to Habits.

If any of the lovely chicas I was with come across my blog: I did love the company, though. Maybe next time I can choose the club. :P You all are too cool for some of the loser guys that were hitting on you there. Although that one guy was nice, Debi. You should go on a date with him.

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